Tuesday 30 January 2007

FIRST DAY













Well, the first night back at work is over. I'm glad about that as I always think that I'll of forgotten everything I once knew, good to get one under the belt.

I was working with one of the two regular partners I have and was "in the back" looking after the patients. Nothing to out of the ordinary although I suspect that the last patient was having a NSTEMI. Basically this is a hear attack without the ECG/EKG changes that are normally present. It was a good cardiac story with the pain coming on at rest, nausea, clammy, previous MI. Basically he looked like he was having a heart attack and the history fitted in with this, although there was no "solid" evidence to support this conclusion.

We did everything we could and battered him in to the Doc's. Hopefully he'll be OK. He laughed at the right places when I was talking to him so he must be a good lad.

Back pain, D&I x 2, maternataxi, couple of NHSD calls that were left at home and a couple of calls we got redirected from. That was it, not bad.

One of the calls we were redirected from though was to a 30 year old man who had broken his leg playing football. Our dispatch system, AMPDS, classifies this as a green call meaning that we can be sent to something more serious while en-route. Poor bloke had been on the ground for 20 mins. when we got sent somewhere else. Where did we go --- to a drunk at a bus stop.

I should just accept this as the way things are; but I cant. It's wrong on so many levels. Frustration sets in and I know I'm back on the bus. Love it.

Monday 29 January 2007

AN ABSOLUTE MUST.
















This must be followed through.

This HERE.

Don't think there's anything better, but there's nothing worse.

I HAVE FIREFOX!

0320320, JOHN, EVA whatever you want to call yourself; I have firefox 2 and, for your info. everything else I currently need.

If you want me to visit your blog/site, interest me. If you cant do that just fuck off, I'm not going to just because you have some free software that everybody already uses.

Your sadder than me. Fuckwits!

Sunday 28 January 2007

HI HO HI HO.











Well, the holidays are over. 11 days away from work and I've achieved nothing with it. Sat around and done hee haw. I really do need to get a life. Not even done the shopping never mind the housework.

Looking forward to going back to the mill. Hopefully something will occur to stimulate my mind. Only four nights though as tonight is a holiday too. Still find it strange to enjoy my work.

Saturday 27 January 2007

I'M SURE THAT WAS MINE, RAY!













I’ve been watching Ray Mears Wild Food on TV. The program where he tries to figure out what food our stone aged ancestors ate. I like his programs.

The guy can do just about everything from making fire from a couple of twigs and a mushroom to canoeing through rapids. He can catch wild things with his hands and climb up mountains. He truly knows how to survive in the wild and would be the person I’d want on my island should I get stuck on one with nothing more than a broken watch.

What keeps me watching these programs though is the suspicion that this all knowing, action-man must spend lots of time watching telly and eating pies.

HERE I AM.













I've been doing quite a lot of lurking on Caramelo and Nicenuse's sites the last couple of days. This has taken up all my time and I must say I'm surprised at the vitriol that has been expressed. I guess that not everyone likes blogs but that some of these people read them anyway. Also personality clashes on the web can be just as destructive and childish as in real life.

Strangely, Nicenurse seems to of ended up being the battleground for issues that had nothing to do with him and, Caramelo is the only one to walk away from his site with any dignity.

Anyway, I hope Caramelo will keep blogging under one name or the other and that Nicenurse has his site back. You can see the slagging matches HERE and HERE respectively.

On a lighter note watch THIS. You may of seen it before, I first saw it about 7 years ago. I still cry.

Wednesday 24 January 2007

GET ME ON A GOOD DAY.

Now here’s the thing, if your drunk, or out of your tits on drugs, be nice to me.

I’m a pretty decent person, really, and do my job because I care about people. Honestly that’s the reason, pretty wanky, but the truth. I like people and I like helping them and, heck, think I’m pretty good at it when their ill, sick or injured.

If your just a piss-head or out your tits on “E” I’ll still be nice to you, even though I know you don’t need my help. If you start the verbal or get punchy I’ll become a lot less caring.

I’ve only been assaulted a couple of times, this year, and neither were very serious. I got a good thwack on the chin from a drunk I was helping from under a bus (no injuries, he placed himself there) and became a bit dizzy as a result, but that’s it.

I’m pretty easy to understand in my belief about self-preservation. I give you 30 seconds. If I walk into your house and you start gobbing off at me, I’ll try and explain/appease but there is only so much I can do. If you really think that because your mate has been drinking for 48 hours and has been sick you can call me a C++t your wrong. If you’re angry that we were not there in 5 minutes you’re wrong. Very wrong, I walk out the door and you can walk the 500m to A&E yourself.

If you really want to hit me make sure you do a good job. At 6’2” and 18 stone (28% body fat) I may be old and slow but you only get one free hit. I am use to getting the odd thump. I’m not sure what “reasonable force” is but remember …. I’m not drunk; and I only want to hit you once.

Usually the police are there do deal with you, thankfully. Just a thought for you though. Think about it if you ever can. I know it’s not happened yet – probably because the police are there to deal with you.

Tossers!

Tuesday 23 January 2007

IN THE NEWS.













My thoughts on this article will be a post in the next couple of days (when I'm over the hangover tomorrow will bring). As will the fact that there seems to be a problem with sending RRU's out with Technicians rather than Paramedics.

Bless the press.

At least this is not to sensationalist.

GOING MAD!!

It’s cold, dark and I’m bored. The only thing good is that it’s snowing. I like the snow and we don’t get enough of it these days.

I’ve got another week of holidays to go before I return to work. I was going to go skiing or take off to the sun for a week but my telly broke. I now have a nice shiny new TV and digibox but nothing to do with my time; other than watch ABC 1.

Bored, bored, bored, bored, bored.

In an attempt to pass the time I’ve been thinking about people I hate. Nicenurse had a good post about the people who think it’s ok to open the back of the bus when there’s a patient onboard. This means I cant really post on these halfwitted, scrotums.

I hate Chavs and have said enough on this for the moment. The same with alcoholics who phone for fun.

I’m just bored. Think I need to get drunk. Maybe I’ll get to build a snowman tomorrow. Must go buy a carrot. That will pass some time.

Monday 22 January 2007

YOUTUBE CLASSICS.















This just made me laugh. Tears in my eyes.

Up with the old girl.

Worth a look.

Sunday 21 January 2007

AM I HUMAN AFTER ALL?













I’ve been off for a couple of days and, in fact, won’t be back at work for another week or so. Using up holidays before I loose them.

The last job I was at before this break was a house fire with one fatality. An elderly smoker who fell asleep and set fire to himself. Not a nice thing. What got me thinking were the actions of the 20-year-old neighbour who ran into the house to try and rescue this old man. A highly commendable and brave thing to do and an action that almost restores my hopes that society is not totally screwed. There are those who would say it was stupid to do this. This is what I have been contemplating over the last day or two:-

Is it stupid and would I do it?

Is it stupid? Well, I’ve got to say yes. He placed himself at risk and while he was unharmed, other than breathing in some smoke, he could of died. It is undoubtedly a brave, courageous thing to do but not the most sensible.

Would I do it? I haven’t decided on this yet. I would like to think that I’d find a nearby phone-box to change in and save the day but I don’t know if I would. Inherently I’m a bit of a coward or at the very least don’t like the idea of getting hurt. There are people I would try everything for; my family, my friends and their kids and, possibly, my neighbours (although I’m not sure about the last.) I’d do everything I could for this select few. If your not known to me I think I might let you fry. Sorry about this but unless I know you’r worth saving I’m not sure I’d risk my life.

Would I expect them to do the same for me? No. I’d be pretty pissed off to think that someone I know placed themselves in danger on my behalf. They all have families to think of and this is the job of the fire brigade. Someone who does not know me from Adam should think about their families too.

Would I run into a burning house? I really don’t think so. All this means is that if I ever find myself in this situation I probably will and be pretty pissed off if someone doesn’t for me.

It’s all theoretical and hopefully will never happen, but I’m still thinking about it. I hope my decision wouldn’t depend on weather or not I thought you were worth saving. Hopefully I’m not that jaded with the world. I think this is what is causing me to stop and think more than the idea of the fire itself. While working I have to place crew safety first. Would I do the same at play? Hmmm???

Friday 19 January 2007

DO YOU OWN A CAR?












There are many things wrong with the Government. Hopefully they will listen to us.

The government's proposal to introduce road pricing will mean you having to purchase a tracking device for your car and paying a monthly bill to use it.

The tracking device will cost about £200 and in a recent study by the BBC, the lowest monthly bill was £28 for a rural florist and £194 for a delivery driver.

A non working Mum who used the car to take the kids to school paid £86 in one month.

On top of this massive increase in tax, you will be tracked. Somebody will know where you are at all times. They will also know how fast you have been going, so even if you accidentally creep over a speed limit you can expect a NIP with your monthly bill.

If you care about our freedoms and stopping the constant bashing of the car driver, please sign the petition on No 10's new website

http://petitions.pm.gov.uk/traveltax/


Please pass this on to anyone who owns a car/motorcycle. It affects ua all

Wednesday 17 January 2007

AN ACT OF THEFT.

For those of you that don't read "Random Acts of Reality" you must watch THIS.

Sorry for the blatent theft.

IT WAS BROUGHT.

Well, today was good by my standards.

The second job was to a 64 YOF with a cold who all but ran to the bus and had her daughter follow in the car. Hated GP referrals by 08:30 hours. Will never understand the lack of thought that Doctors put into things like these. Blood pressure up and the day begins.

Just before lunch a call came through to an 82 YOM with chest pain. On arrival he looked fine but using the skills of a sleuth, that would make Bergerac proud, discovered a barn door MI. These skills involved doing a 12 lead ECG and asking him some standard questions. Now until December this would have been thrombolised; but now we take kids like this to the “cath lab” for an angioplasty (balloon in the artery to expand the vessel). First time taking someone here so this equates as a good job. Pain relief, heparin and transport. Job done and I hope he’s going to be ok although they decided that an angioplasty wasn’t appropriate.

Second last job was to a 55 YOM with an almost un-natural medical history for someone his age. You could tell that he had been a big, strong, intelligent and, I guess, handsome man. Now he has osteoporosis, Parkinson’s, infective soars in his legs, cellulitys – for a start. It was a long list. I guess that he wouldn’t want my pity, and well, I wont give it. I do however feel for this man ravaged by such indiscriminating and debilitating diseases at such a young age. There are so many people we come across that are just a waste of skin. If I believed in god, which I don’t, I’d think, “You bastard!”

Tuesday 16 January 2007

BRING IT ON!!















Today I was desperate to get something interesting to deal with. Tuesday dayshift always seems to be a struggle, it’s quite a quick turn around from the weekend nights and the old body clock seems to always kick me in the nuts on the Tuesday.

Nothing. Nothing at all of any interest. To make things worse everyone needed an ambulance and was very nice to deal with. Couldn’t even get angry at the system or hate a patient, even for a wee while.

Hopefully tomorrow someone will piss me of and I can enjoy the day. Bit board today.

Monday 15 January 2007

UNCONCIOUS, UNKNOWN PROBLEM.












What can we do? In the last four year I have been to one person who was genuinely unconscious; he was a technician who worked at a neighbouring station and was seriously ill.

Now, if you have a GCS of 8 or below you are in a coma; I accept this as being unconscious/unwell. In fact if your GCS is, seriously, below 12 you get quite a lot of my attention and a very quick trip to hospital. Just because you’re too pissed to walk doesn’t interest me. Pretending to of taken an overdose does not either.

Why do you think I’ll find this interesting? Why do your friends? Because you have spent 10 hours drinking vodka and red bull I wont find you any more interesting than I would otherwise. The six co-codamol you’ve taken over the last 8 hours don’t really interest me either!

I get that the general public don’t understand that to be unconscious your, well, unconscious. Not responding to anything. Really out of it; I mean really out of it.

Why can’t you take your pissed friend home? Why can’t you behave like a friend and look after your mates? Why do you think I’ll care when you don’t?

Bunch of wankers. If my mates acted like most of the “you” out there I wouldn’t talk to them any more!

Sunday 14 January 2007

WHAT STRANGER THING??

The first job was to a 3 YOM who had pulled a pot of hot oil onto himself. He was very lucky. About 3% burns to his arm and similar to his face. All looked pretty superficial and he’s going to be ok but I must say that jobs like this get my bowels moving. Always worry about kids in situations where things could deteriorate.

I also got to see my first dislocated patella reduced. Seen many arms and ankles etc but never a knee. The pissed 14 year old had fallen and oops, knee cap round the side of the leg. It was actually really simple. You straighten the leg and it just slides into place. Very interesting to see and something I learnt, always good.

Couple of assaults, a spurious OD and an old dear that woke her daughter up coughing. There was at least one other job but, honestly, I can’t remember what it was; oh there was a 73 YOF with the flu. That’s about it though.

Another Saturday night over and more lives saved. Job done. Not even any prats to contend with although I have a feeling that one of the assaults probably got what was coming but, who am I to judge.

Saturday 13 January 2007

SCARED.
















Friday night is always busy. Lots of drunks to contend with. Assaults, falls and the usual amount of sick Grannies. I quite like them really as you tend to know what your up against.

Not last night though. It was strangely quiet. The weather was wilde and, I guess, people had spent their cash over Christmas but I don’t trust nights like that. They unsettle me.

Tonight we’ll pay.

Thursday 11 January 2007

HUMOUR

A man walks into his son’s room and says, “ I don’t mean to embarrass you but if you don’t stop masturbating you’ll go blind.”

The son says, “Dad; I’m over here.”

IT SHOULDN'T HAPPEN TO A ..................
















NeeNaw has posted about a couple of incidents at control where the callers were obviously formed from the excess scrotal skin of an elderly, kilt-wearing highlander.

For a while now I have been saving up a couple of stories; this sounds like the time.

We all find it amazing that people, with no debilitating illness, are prepared to wait for 2 hours on an ambulance. Usually when they do the mother, son, husband etc. will jump in their car and follow you to the hospital. Now, this pisses me off because even if they have not got the common sense to realise that an ambulance is not a fun ride, and that we have serious things to do, their GP should.

Last shift, on Monday, we got a call from a GP to a 49 YOM with chest pain. We were, literally, as far away as it is possible to get without leaving the region. Never the less we got there, after some F’ing and Blinding at other road users, within 17 minutes. It was a frightening drive really although it felt like fun at the time.

Knock, Knock – no reply. Shout through the letterbox – not a sound. No one visible through the windows. This is the point that we either kick the door in or call the Police to do it for us. After hearing all the fuss a neighbour appeared asking if we were looking for Mr Y. Yip, knocked on his door and am about to start kicking; that would be Mr Y were looking for. Oh, says she, he left with his wife about 20 minutes ago. Fuck, fuck, fucker, tit, cock!!

Good on him for doing this, although really in this situation an ambulance was required and he’d have been better waiting for us. But couldn’t he of let someone know, even the GP who was calling as he got into the family saloon. This irked me as much as the follow up people.

Should have kicked the door in anyway.

__________________________________________________________

A woman was with her mum for 2 hours waiting for transportation to Hospital A. She had been booked in here by her GP as she has ongoing problems and is receiving treatment here. Getting a bit fed up with this she called Hospital A, allegedly, who, allegedly, informed her just to call 999.

Now this was all crap as the hospital staff don’t do this (although see next post). Up we turn to a 999 and get the story. Fall 2 weeks ago and a sore back. Lovely old dear but her daughter obviously did not realise that ambulance crews come with a fully working “load of bollocks o’meter”.

Yes, yes they told you to call 999, Hmmm, strange that because we can’t take you to Hospital A. No honestly; it just does not accept emergency calls any more (this is true – just to clarify); we will need to go to Hospital B on the other side of the globe. Ah, yes its very busy but the original transport request has been cancelled so you’d go back to the bottom of the list and the weight will be about 4 hours.

Off we go. Sorry about that dinner you’re going to miss tonight. Ah, you heard the nurse say that there’s a six-hour wait. What a fucking shame.

______________________________________________________________

Wooo Weeee Wooo “ fucking idiot, out the way”!! Weeeeee Weeeeee “ pull over, cock!” Woooo Woooo Woooo. Were there. Bag and O2 up the steps, where is he? Watching TV. What’s the problem? And I quote, “ he’s been of colour for the last three months, the doctor took some bloods yesterday and booked him in to the hospital.”

I must have missed something. “So, what’s changed that led you to call 999?”

“Nothing, the person on the phone said they could arrange transport through the bed bureau but it would be faster to call an emergency ambulance.” The reply came.

I looked at her like she was beneath contempt. She noticed and had the decency to blush. Most don’t.

I tried to find out more details about the source of the suggestion, as I have never come across this before. Also it sounded like the bollocks of all bollocks. She wasn’t able to provide much more info and she seemed to be genuine enough. I reported it to the Duty Officer who was equally baffled and followed it up.

It transpired that the GP had to get home for his salad so left it to a secretary to organise transportation. This was her solution, an NHS employee with no medical training what so ever, saying that according to the doctors notes she thought the situation was life threatening. It was her that advised that it would be quicker to call an emergency ambulance. Stupid, stupid, cow. I hope she looses her job. I really do.

If it was her job at all, and not the GP’s, she should have done what she was told.

EDUCATION.


















Just a thought.

Wouldn’t it be cool if school kids got to read some of the Blogs from people in the Emergency Services. We all know that politicians should, and some do but pay no attention. School kids would get the knowledge of what we do and hopefully learn not to call when little toe is stubbed.

Something needs to be done about the level of unnecessary calls; and I hate to suggest that teachers need something else to worry about but a little project or something would do it. I’m sure that there must be something in schools; I don’t have kids, relating to the evils of alcohol, knife carrying, drugs etc. It could be fitted in with this.

Wednesday 10 January 2007

SWAB TEAM 6



Further to my application to SWAB I thought I'd submit an example of my "Parkland and Rural Areas Covert Transportation Vehicle"

Not wanting to sound too keen but hay, if you got it ......

ABOUT TIME.

















This has been doing the rounds a bit today. I'm glad it's been brought to my attention and signed up straight away.

http://petitions.pm.gov.uk/USE-999-PROPERLY
/

If you have not by now, please do.

THE BING.












It was over a year ago, the summer of 2005. A good hot day where everyone seemed to have a smile on their face. I know I did and my crewmate who is normally grumpier than me laughed on at least two occasions. All was well.

We were on station having a cuppa when the bat phone rang. Motorbike accident at random shale Bing in the general area of Smallruralvillage. Off we went trying to get more precise directions and were advised that we would be met at the end of Road to Nowhere road. As we got to the allotted spot there were a couple of youngsters on Trail bikes that waved and headed off along a track. This was not good; it felt like it was going to be a proper job and seeing these blokes tearing off at speed sent a shiver down my spine. I reached into my bag and got out the stethoscope and tough cuts. Progress was slow over the mud track and it seemed to take forever to get to where the track ended.

Out we hopped and grabbed the response kit, bag, O2, defib and even a blanket. Everything that the manual says you should take and that we don’t to most jobs. Dodging around the police car I wondered where the coppers were and started a half-walk/jog thing over the half mile to where the patients were. I heard another ambulance arrive and thought, “Thank fuck”.

I get a brief history from a kid on a motorbike. Head on collision, probably each doing 40 mph.

Turning a corner I saw two people on the ground with a policeman doing CPR on one. This is where I headed and relieved the copper of this responsibility. Could he hear me? No. Were there resps or pulse? No. Good man that copper, doing the right thing. Checking his c-spine told me it was broken, very broken. Think of immobilising it and then think – better to get the oxygen in and blood moving. I started to continue CPR and one of the Paramedics on the second ambulance tubed the guy and got IV access. He was in charge here so I went to the second patient.

This person was 18 and conscious, GCS 15. Where are you sore? Ok, left leg and arm and your ribs. Head to toe examination to find any other injuries then expose and examine – look, feel, listen. No evidence of c-spine. Yip, pretty sure the arm and leg are bust and think there’s reduced air entry in the right lung. My partner confirms this. He’s already on oxygen and I can’t give Entonox for the pain, as there is a suspect pneumothorax. IV access and Metoclopromide then Morphine. He’s comfortable.

The helicopter is on the way; this should take 15-20 minutes. I see CPR still being done in the distance and new oxygen cylinders and bags of fluid are being brought up from the bus. It really is not looking good for this young man, 20.

I take a BP and get my patient wired up to the defib to see if I can spot anything sinister. Nope all well. His stomach is normal with no swelling or rigidity and his BP is normal. Limbs are splinted. I explain that despite the fact he has no pain in the neck or down his back were going to have to immobilise him, given the mechanism of injury. He’s ok with this; I’ve already cut off most of his body armour, boots etc. so I didn’t think he’d mind. Collar on and some friends are instructed how to assist with a log role as my mate has taken hold of the head and can’t let go. We have time to explain this as someone retrieves the spinal board from the ambulance; they also come back with the Area Officer, a good man.

On to the board and where the fuck is the helicopter? It’s been called primarily for the person who has arrested as a result of the trauma but we are all getting to the point that we know it is, ultimately, going to be futile. We’ve been there half an hour now and it’s getting time to “call” it. He’s been flat line since arrival and probably for the 15 minutes from the accident to our arrival. My colleagues are still pumping his chest with a determination and resolve that says “your 20 and we wont give up, not yet” but a decision must be made. The area officer steps up to the mark as the helicopter arrives.

It kicks up a storm of black, fine dust that blinds us and sticks to our sweating faces. The medics on the ‘copter take a handover and load the 18 year old into the back. Most of the spectators have dispersed at this point with the help of the 7 or 8 policemen who have turned up unknown to me in my focused state. The young man I have been dealing with for the last 30 – 40 minutes has gone. He’ll be OK. Sore but OK. Between us my crewmate and myself covered everything we could think off. Nothing evidently life threatening but x-rays and a doctor will confirm this. I’ll never see him again.

As the dust settles there are half a dozen coppers, with one of them owning braid on the peek of his hat, and 5 ambulance men, one with 3 pips on his shoulder, standing in silence. No one wants to look at the corpse of the 20 year old as if it screams out “why did you stop? Why! Why could you not do more?!”.

Slowly people start to move, gathering equipment, talking in hushed voices. Everybody feels it. Whatever “it” is about this job “it’s” got to us. The other crew are passed their finish time so we say we’ll remove the body to the police morgue. He’s covered up and placed on the orthopaedic stretcher and carried to the ambulance. I catch a look at my face in the wing mirror and that of my partner.

Maybe it’s the dust that covers us but the lines on our faces look deeper – we look like we have just become a little bit older, we’ve left something of ourselves on this remote, barren landscape. But not as much as some.

I leave work and go for a drink, go home and cry. Call my colleague and cry some more. I turn up at work the next day, not because I want to, but because I need to be with someone who understands.

I don’t know why, but I took this one home. I can no longer remember their names but I will always know their faces and I will always recognise the haunted look on my partners face as we closed the doors on the back of the bus.

THE WONDER OF IT ALL.













Sometimes I wonder, just wonder why the country is full of Chav's.

Adverts, on the radio and TV, state that one in five people have difficulty in reading, writing and sums. In my day it was reading, writing and arithmetic, to say nothing about maths.

I dislike these people, not those that have a genuine problem with learning, but Chav’s. I know that there may have been unfortunate family circumstances and that they are not responsible for their own actions or behaviour. God help that they should take ownership of their attitudes or attempt to turn up at school for more than 2 days a week.

Why when they have six or seven siblings are they so maladjusted to general society? Why, having lived with the deprivation that having parents that have never worked creates, do they breed at 15? Why is Burberry so popular? Why don’t they realise that everything will be provided for them by the state and that having a job is bad for their image.

Sometimes I wonder, just wonder.

THE DARK SIDE OF IT.














I seem to remember reading somewhere, in the distant past, that research has found that there is no relationship between the moon being full and an increase in admissions to A&E.

I guess that this must be true as a whole bunch of people with BSc's and knowledge of statistics have proven this. So, accepting the fact of this I must say it is, to my mind, total crap. There is a change that takes place over the full moon.

Now, there could be a number of reasons that statistics dont show this.

They may not pick up the fact that on any friday night the ambulance service is at capacity. If the most jobs that can be done by a crew in a shift is 14, then an increase just means people dont get an ambulance before they decide to go home. People go home with a cut eye rather than get themselves to hospital by taxi so no increase in admissions.

The type of incident is different. On any given night there may be X amount of assault. These are usually drink induced in a pub and involve a couple of scroats that would be better off being used as practice targets for knife throwers. When the full moon shines it wonder on the earth there may still be only X amount of assaults but these seem to be more random. Innocent blokes walking home to the wife after a couple of drinks with his best mate. Kerpow.... he's on his back while some scum he's never seen before has hit him over the back of the head with a bit of 4*2.

I tend to be silly enough to believe research but I know from experience that the full moon thing is not just an urban rumour. The moon exerts quite considerable powers on the earth and people have even worshiped it. It makes my back hurt and I tend to wake up naked in a field with a funny iron like taste in my mouth, I think my nose must bleed too as my face is covered in blood. Strange.

Anyone I have brought this subject up with in the emergency services, and those I know in education, say the same thing. Beware the full moon. The next one is on the 19th and I'm on a rest day. How cool is that.

Tuesday 9 January 2007

ASSISTANCE REQUIRED.

Yip, I’ve seen someone.

Angrier than usual with the underclass yesterday. Was hurtling through Northtown on lights and sirens to a suspected MI when we got flagged down by a bloke about 20. This was at 1730 hours.

Radiod conrol who allocated a job number and would of had to find another crew for the 64 year old having a heart attack. “my mates collapsed” sais young man 1.

“What happened?” says I.

“He’s pretty pissed, we’ve been drinking since 11am” says young man 1.

Red mist crept into my field of vision, a target forming between the too close together eyes.

Combined with last nights whisky my thoughts were extreme. Please accept my apologies.

MOVIES.













Now, I was not going to blog tonight because it's my Friday night. I've just done 48 hours and although it's a Monday this is my Friday. I own this time. I can do what I want.

Monday night TV is pants so at this point in the shift pattern I get a couple of DVD's and settle down with a drink. Tonight my drink selection was one of the rather pleasant malts that I got gifted over the festive period and the DVD's are as described below. I have had much fun and wish to impart this to the general public. The post is about the films.

First I watched "NACHO LIBRE". This is the sort of film I like. Switch of the brain and leave it ticking over in neutral (my normal state). Laughed a lot and thoroughly enjoyable nonsense. Jack Black makes me laugh.

Secondly, "TONY JAA, WARRIOR KING". Boy this was good. Everything I love. Enough contrived sentiment to bring a tear to my eye and kick ass moves that had me on my feet. I'm too old, fat and slow to ever think of kicking ass but when you see a movie like this I want to move to Thailand and become a lethal weapon. I truly believe that I could do it at the moment. Tomorrow I'll have a hangover and feel 90. Enjoy it while I can. If you have even heard of the movie "Blood Sport" this is your thing. (the same with "Born Free")

Lastly, and if you have red this far your in for a treat, was "BEERFEST". If you have ever been young and had a good time with good friends this is the movie for you. It's a bit from the male perspective but women are just as guilty and know the score, probably better than we do. If I wasn't grinning like a fool I was laughing out loud. I know these people and am, in fact, one of them. It may be sad to admit but this is one of the best films I've seen in ages. Watch it. That's all I can really say. If you don't like it then your more mature and responsible than me, and god bless your little cotton socks for that.

Sunday 7 January 2007

TODAY.

I've been trying to fight of a cold for the last 5 days. It has inspired me to try and stop smoking again. I think, however,that the double whammy of man flu and nicotine withdrawal could explain yesterdays paranoia and inability to join up any two thoughts.

Today was a good day though. Only once did I have to refrain from hitting someone. Calling an ambulance for a sore throat you were at the doctors with on Friday is stupid. Stupid people breed. Breed lots. More than the average bear.

I'm shivering, have a runny nose, headache and everything hurts. Just one punch would of made me feel so much better. If it was in the right spot it might of stopped him breeding. Even the thought brings a glow to my otherwise pallid, snot-covered visage.

Of to my scratcher early tonight. My eyeballs hurt.

Saturday 6 January 2007

TODAY IT WAS NOT MY FAULT

Not sure if today was a good one or a bad one at the office.Of the nine jobs 3 of them actually required an emergency response, which is ,sadly, a pretty good percentage.

Sometimes you turn up and have a great day. For no particular reason you enjoy the company of the patients and have good crack with your work partner. The illnesses are never out of the norm but seem more interesting. You get to a good trauma and everything just slots into place. The patient gets assessed, packaged, delivered and you leave hospital feeling like you did a good job.

Not one of those days. It could of been if it was not for the second last job of the shift. Sometimes you turn up at a good trauma and feel like a clown.

We were at the hospital dreaming of food and a hot coffee when we got a call to a rugby ground for a "traumatic injury, dangerous body area". Not having any more information and not knowing if this means that the patient has very sharp fingers which need to be kept clear of we hit the road. Now, I played a bit of representative rugby as a school kid so kind of like these jobs as I feel at home it the mud and the chances are I'll know the coach, or nowadays the parents of the team member.

Turning up at the ground I said to my colleague that we probably shouldn't go on to the grass as we could get stuck. I would stress at this point that I was NOT driving. Not this time. The patient was surrounded by waving friends all looking frantic and I had to close my eyes as we mounted the kerb. Four metres later there was the all to familiar feel of an Ambulance becoming sucked towards the centre of the earth. Oops but hay, at least I was not driving.

The referee ran up and gave us an idea of the injury which was spinal and potentially dangerous. We unloaded the spinal board, head hugger's, straps, blankets, oxygen, response kit, radio, mobile phone. Everything we could think of and headed off the 300m to the patient.

Someone had placed him in the recovery position which may not of been the best thing for the suspected injury. You should really leave them alone if possible, in my book, if the airway is clear. Anyway, it's usually the best thing to do so I'll let them off - no hand slapping's.

The story was that he had been tackled, landed on his head and his body had gone over the top forcing his head further forward than his creator intended. His creator was a generous man, at 5'10" and I guess 19 stone there was a lot of him. A good old fashioned prop from the 1970-80's before they all became professional athletes. Consequently there was not much of a neck to be in danger but this could be very serious so you always suspect the worse and treat accordingly.

His spine was tender from about c3 to t4/5 (middle of the neck to the shoulder blades) with some tingling in his left hand. Ahh, warning signs, I wanted to get a collar on, immobilise the man and get him out of the cold and on the way to hospital.

My colleague was at the bus arranging for a second crew to come and transport the patient so I tried to radio her on the mobile handset. It's broken - again; it was "repaired" 2 weeks ago.

Middle of a field with a stuck Ambulance, again, with an audience watching as I start to swear and grumble under my breath. Without our bits and bobs were first aiders like any other. So, as I was unable to do anything on my own I stood there for a minute trying to calm down and explain to the guy what a complete tool I was feeling.

Luckily at this point a couple of his mates ran up; one was a water fairy the other a life guard. Both with training in the use of a spinal board. Could I be saved? Yes!!! We were also joined by a consultant urologist who lived across the park. Magic, the doctor took control of the head/neck and on we put a stiff collar. This went terribly and I knew it would. I think I'm OK at my job and hopefully I'm at least that good. Getting even our shortest collar on to someone whose shoulders start around his ears is never easy. I hope the doctor know this because I felt like I had only thumbs with which to attempt this maneuver.

With the assistance of the buy standers we managed a log role onto the spinal board, got blankets back over him and then I discovered I'd forgotten the straps. Bugger!! Really I'm not this incompetent but with my mate still in the wind I was once again having to send a runner to the bus for equipment. Once on a board there is only about half an hour before they have to come off, bed sores develop and our A&E wont accept them. The clock was ticking.

At this point the other ambulance turned up we strapped the patient to the board and the long slog started. The patient had been on the ground for about 40 mins. by now and I wanted to get him warm and away a.s.a.p. Normally I bring the trolley out the bus which makes placing someone who is immobilised on it really quite easy. Not today though and with the helpers not knowing the footsteps required to dance in an ambulance we all but dropped the poor guy.

Anyway, away he went leaving us to get a tow out of the swamp by a very kind man with his Land Cruiser.

What did I learn:-
1. Do not drive on the grass.
2. Double check that I take everything I may require when walking any distance from the van.
3. My mobile phone is better than the service radio system (everyone knows this really, I've just never been caught out before).
4.If I do something stupid keep my head. Because there's a consultant something there that should not bother me, it normally dose not.
5. If it's my patient at the time work my way. Everybody dose the same thing but develops their own way of doing it, so - get the trolley out the back.
6. Even relatively straightforward jobs can leave you looking, and feeling, like a bit of a Gumby.

There will be more I learn from this as I ponder it through the night. I love my job and in particular incidents similar to this. I normally leave thinking that I've done a good job and feeling proud of what I do and how I do it. Not today though.

Bad day at the office.

Friday 5 January 2007

BACK TO WORK.














Well the first day back at work is over. It went something like this:-

Job 1. Epistaxis (bleeding nose).
Job 2. Code Purple (person who has been dead for some time).
Job 3. Code Purple (getting a bad feeling about today at this point).
Job 4. CVA (stroke).
Job 5. Patient with tracheotomy with breathing difficulties (more to come).
Job 6. 2yo with a cut to the head after a fall (nasty cut, poor wee sole)

So not too busy and not as bad as I thought. job five made me angry as I usually am when I find out that people are better off than me by living on the dole/state. Apparently she's disabled because of the tracheotomy so has a brand new Nissan x-trail. It's just all so fuc*** up. bring back the poor houses.

Thursday 4 January 2007

BACK TO THE REAL WORLD

Been watching the news now I'm back in the world of TV, and....

Well there are going to be shortages in the NHS over the next few years. I am aghast, how could this not be seen. Amazed that cuts and the politicians lies mean that Doctors are moving abroad and that there is a shortage of Nurses. How could things get to the stage where it is one of the lead articles on the national news? Surely someone knew, somewhere!!

Also, a 9yo girl in America has been neutered and subject to medication to stop her getting older. I have no problem with animal testing, stem cell research etc. etc. but this made me feel sick. Her parents think that because she has the mind of a 3 month old baby that this is OK. Hope they burn in Hell, or whichever particular pit of despair they believe in.

Where's that ferry timetable; I need a holiday.

GUESS WHAT I GOT UP TO...
















Well, I'm back from a fantastic week on Islay. I must say that it a beautiful place and that I'll be back; largely because my mate has a holiday home there but also because I liked it so much.

Much alcohol was consumed, food eaten and a general feeling of good will spread through the land as is the theme of the season. The weather was awful however. I don't think the wind got below 50mph at any point with gusts over new years eve in excess of 100mph. It was exciting though having to batten down the hatches. It rained most of the time too with squalls being driven of the Atlantic by these gale force winds. I love it really, cooreying down in front of an open fire with the weather doing its best to let you know who's boss.

For the first time in my life, though, I went land yachting (hence the pic.) and I loved it. I've done a bit of sailing in my time but it's really quite easy and don't think this helped much. I'm quite a big lad and it takes quite a breeze to get me going so conditions were perfect.

It's a bit like setting up a wind surfer on wheels except for the fixed mast. 10 minutes and your off. I loved the exhilarating of tearing along the beach at 30-40mph with my bum only inches from the sand. Of course I got soaked to the skin but, hay, what the hell...... I'm going to buy one.Love it, love it, love it. The last sport I tried that took me like this was surfing, not that I do that much anymore so why not. I only live 8 miles from a beach.

Hope the holidays, if you got any, were as good as mine and that '07 is fab..